The most difficult part of parenting is watching children struggle with problems. In the past week, I spent the night with my toddler nephew who flailed around in bed as he fought his way to sleep and then went home to my teenage son who's trying to decide which colleges interest him. The bad news? Children's trials never go away, nor do they get easier to witness. The good news is children's books exist to help even young children find words to express big feelings and characters who can show them strategies.
The push-pull of independence and reassurance is one of life's earliest problems. Miela Ford's On My Own(Greenwillow, $5.95; ages 1-3)shows a polar bear mama and cub who walk, talk, and sing together until baby tells mama "I can play on my own." After wiggles, stretches, climbing and counting adventures, he rolls back for a snuggle. This simple board book with tender photographs and a few well-chosen words reflects the issue perfectly.
Sometimes growing doesn't happen fast enough. That's what the small bear cub believes in Holly Keller's Jacob's Tree (Greenwillow, $15.00; ages 3-5). Jacob hates not being able to reach things, not being as able as his older siblings, pants that are too big, and most of all waiting to grow. After a year, of impatience, Jacob's physical growth is measurable. This improvement is matched by a confidence that gives Jacob patience to wait for even more growing up.
Another bear cub, Alfie, deals with problems in two new books written by Mathew Price and illustrated by Emma Chichester Clark. In Don't Worry, Alfie, (Orchard, $9.95; ages 2-5) he makes his way through the jungle with his mother who continually comforts him as dangerous animals pass by. In Where's Alfie? (Orchard, $9.95; ages 2-5) the young cub avoids bed with hiding games. In both books, feelings are strong, solutions satisfying, and ingenious pop-up designs make Alfie even more endearing.
There are many problems that plague children when it's time to sleep. Sometimes it's hard for young children to find sleep. In Joan Goodman's Bernard's Nap , (Boyds Mills Press, $14.95; ages 2-6) an elephant child's entire family is involved in getting him to sleep. They all manage naps ...except Bernard!
Those who are monster phobic will enjoy meeting Dennis, the hero of Jeanne Willis' The Monster Bed (Mulberry Books, $4.95; ages 3-6). Dennis is petrified of young humans! Clever rollicking verse and comic illustrations by Susan Varley are a comforting way to lighten the bedtime fears.
Carol Roth's Little Bunny's Sleepless Night (North-South Books, $15.95; ages 3-5) book has different slumber woes. He can't get to sleep because he's all alone. When he travels to the houses of friends for relief, he finds that Squirrel's nut-cracking habit is too loud, it smells at Skunk's house, and Porcupine's quill bed is ouchy! After five unsuccessful visits, Little Bunny discovers his own bed is the very best.
For other characters, siblings make for a slew of problems. Marc Brown's feisty D.W. is tormented by her crawling sister, Kate. D.W. threatens a pinch, screams, and finally takes away a block stolen by Kate. Her mother's response? D.W., Go to Your Room (Little Brown, $13.95; ages 3-5) which is also the title this new Brown book. Dramatic D.W. suffers all the ills of imprisonment. She feels sorry for herself, she's tortured by time, and misses being a part of family. Finally, after she's run through all her moods, she's released from feelings and confinement by none other than baby Kate.
It's hard to celebrate a birthday when it's not yours. Robbie has a hard time at brother Christopher's party in Lynne Jonell's It's My Birthday, Too! (Putnam, $12.99; ages 3-6) Big brother Christopher's not excited about having Robbie attend his birthday. Last year Robbie wrecked the party. Robbie wants to share this party and agrees to come...as a puppy. Robbie's an even worst guest in canine guise, but brotherly love triumphs at the end. Petra Mathers' bright stick-figure illustrations do a great job of showing feelings and silly situations.
Pat Hutchins' adorable monster baby, Billy, is back in It's My Birthday (Greenwillow, $15.00; ages 3-6). He's unwilling to share his presents with birthday guests. They don't seem to mind much for they find substitute toys and play on their own. When sister Hazel gives a gift that Billy must play with others, he decides he needs friends. He shares the games, the rest of his new presents, and cake besides. Bright colorful illustrations will draw in children who will recognize the sharing situations which plague them.
Very complicated feelings are expressed in Margot Austin's A Friend for Growl Bear (HarperCollins, $14.95; ages 3-6). Growl Bear is much loved at home, but his "Gr-r-r-r-r-r-r" alienates and scares the forest animals. They treat him cruelly until they realize he only growls because he doesn't yet know how to speak. A great book to launch discussions appearances can be deceiving in first friendships. Illustrations by David McPhail contribute with emotionally sensitive portrayals.